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missile
i said peanuts

Registered: Feb 2002
Location: Leeds, England
Posts: 277

what have he learned ?

WHAT WE HAVE LEARNED FROM PORN:

1. Women wear high heels to bed.
2. Men are never impotent.
3. When going down on a woman, 10 seconds is more than satisfactory.
4. If a woman gets busted masturbating by a strange man, she will not
scream with embarassment, but rather insist he have sex with her.
5. Women smile appreciatively when men splat them in the face with sperm.
6. Women enjoy having sex with ugly, middle-aged men.
7. Women moan uncontrollably when giving a blowjob.
8. Women always orgasm when men do.
9. A blowjob will always get a woman off a speeding ticket.
10. All women make noise..
11. People in the 70's couldn't **** unless there was a wild guitar solo in the
background.
12. Those tits are real.
13. A common and enjoyable sexual practice for a man is to take his half-erect penis and slap it repeatedly on a woman's butt. (my fav)
14. Men always groan "OH YEAH" when they cum.
15. If there is two of them they "high five" each other and the girl
isn't disgusted.
16. Double penetration makes a woman smile.
17. Asian men don't exist.
18. If you come across a guy and his girlfriend having sex in the bushes, the
boyfriend doesn't knock the shit out of you if you shove your cock in his
girlfriends mouth.
19. There's a plot.
20. When taking a woman from behind, a man can really excite her by giving her a
gentle slap on the butt.
21. Nurses suck patients cocks.
22. Men always pull out.
23. When your girlfriend busts you getting head from her best friend,
she'll only be momentarily pissed off before ****ing the both of you.
24. Women never have headaches....or periods.
25. When a woman is sucking a man's cock, it's important for him to remind her
to "suck it".
26. Assholes are clean.
27. A man ejaculating on a woman's butt is a satisfying result for all
parties concerned.
28. Women always look pleasantly surprised when they open a man's trousers and
find a cock there.
29. Men don't have to beg.
30. When standing during a blowjob, a man will always place one hand firmly on
the back of the kneeling woman's head and the other
proudly on his hip.

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Old Post 11-07-2002 09:52 AM
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president doc
Moderator

Registered: Oct 2001
Location: London.
Posts: 6137

before this thread is destroyed....teehee

__________________
God, Ive become such a fatty

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Old Post 11-07-2002 09:57 AM
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missile
i said peanuts

Registered: Feb 2002
Location: Leeds, England
Posts: 277

yea i know

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Old Post 11-07-2002 09:59 AM
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Venus
Status: Freezing cold

Registered: Oct 2001
Location: England Elvenname: Ainari?l Telr?nya
Posts: 6157

What we have learned: missile is obsessed with sex and homosexuals.

__________________
Temptations, unlike opportunities, will always give you second chances.

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Old Post 11-07-2002 10:02 AM
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missile
i said peanuts

Registered: Feb 2002
Location: Leeds, England
Posts: 277

Venus is obsessed with ME the almighty missile

Edit : yeaaaaa thanks Jaffa Kree for the (Mature Audiences).

Last edited by missile on 11-07-2002 at 10:16 AM

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Old Post 11-07-2002 10:04 AM
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Kamakazi Casper
Baaaa. Down Sheeba.

Registered: Oct 2001
Location: Out keeping the fish in the liffy well fed
Posts: 3588

That counts you out then doesn'it it?

But anyway, teehee.

__________________
Virginia was a lot lizard from F.L.A.
She had a compound fracture in the trunk
It started when she ran away, thumbs out on the interstate
She hitched a ride to misery

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Old Post 11-07-2002 10:33 AM
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O'Neill
Spam King since 1983.

Registered: Mar 2002
Location: Edinburgh,UK
Posts: 1687

ROFL.

Guts man real guts.

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Old Post 11-07-2002 11:07 AM
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missile
i said peanuts

Registered: Feb 2002
Location: Leeds, England
Posts: 277

Re: what have he learned ?

[QUOTE][i]Originally posted by missile [/i]
[B]30. When standing during a blowjob, a man will always place one hand firmly on
the back of the kneeling woman's head and the other
proudly on his hip. [/B][/QUOTE]

this is the best one

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Old Post 11-07-2002 11:15 AM
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dr.taz
*NUKED* *
missile
*NUKED* *
Jaffa
U all go squish now!

Registered: Oct 2002
Location: USA, Near Washington DC
Posts: 1157

wow, go missile, dude does have guts indeed

sorry, dude wasnt thinking , give me a break i just woke up

__________________
-If everyone is thinking alike, then somebody isn't thinking. General George S. Patton
-"I'm gonna live forever, or die trying."Joseph Heller(Catch22).
"When you are courting a nice girl an hour seems like a second. When you sit on a red-hot cinder a second seems like an hour. That's relativity."
Albert Einstein

Last edited by Jaffa on 11-07-2002 at 02:23 PM

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Old Post 11-07-2002 01:36 PM
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Vern
ADSL Pirate

Registered: Jan 2002
Location: Broadband Britain
Posts: 1278

Crude but funny

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Old Post 11-07-2002 01:46 PM
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missile
*NUKED* *
Venus
Status: Freezing cold

Registered: Oct 2001
Location: England Elvenname: Ainari?l Telr?nya
Posts: 6157

Can you not lose the arrogance? I was just starting to consider maybe sometime taking you seriously, now we're back to square one again.

I appreciate I could be seen as starting it, but can we not avoid swapping insults?

__________________
Temptations, unlike opportunities, will always give you second chances.

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Old Post 11-07-2002 02:54 PM
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Rhydderch Hael
The Radiation King

Registered: Oct 2001
Location: On station at a distant underground nuclear missile silo...
Posts: 1816

Sorry, but we're gonna have to put this puppy in the lake. Not so much for the porn theme, but rather as how it was successfully used to incite people to cast insults back and forth in an attempt to stir up attention.

__________________

Dogs rock. Shut up.

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Old Post 11-07-2002 04:48 PM
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